"no means yes" - Communication in BGR…

We have learned a lot about communication in the past 3 months and I would like to see how we can apply those skills in boy-girl relationship situations. To put it simply, I’m talking about how you communicate with your boyfriends and girlfriends!

I for one have experienced my share of communication problems with my girlfriend! One of the main issues is the “no means yes” problem. This problem usually arises when a girl wants something but says the opposite of it. For example, girl asked if boy wants to meet her for dinner, and boy said that he had already eaten. Boy then told girl that he can accompany her if she wants him to but there is some hesitation in his tone. Hearing boy’s tone, girl will say that they do not have to meet. Now boy will know from girl’s tone that she is disappointed so he will again offer to meet but she will refuse again. So it goes to and fro and if they ended up not meeting, chances are girl will be angry that boy does not meet her even though she herself said that they do not have to meet.

We can definitely classify this as very poor communication. Firstly, boy should state that he does not really feel like meeting since he has already eaten. Girl should also make her feelings clear that she does actually wants him to accompany her instead of saying the opposite. Of course, the 'right' thing to do is for boy to comply.

Well, it seems easy but I think that most of you will agree with me that it is not so straightforward in a boy-girl relationship. It involves a lot of guessing and deducing what the other party really wants.

So, how do you people feel about this? Please feel free to share any other problems which you think may arise in boy-girl relationships.

my Biodata...

Mohamed Reza Bin Mohd Nasir is a forth year undergraduate in the National University of Singapore (NUS). He is majoring in Mechanical Engineering and will be graduating with a Bachelors degree in June 2009. The engineering program has equipped him with the necessary engineering knowledge while elective modules taken in other faculties ensure that he has a diverse education in other areas such as business, arts and science.

Reza is a highly motivated, dynamic and aspiring individual with the eagerness to pursue a career as an engineer preferably related to his interest in product design and green technology. On top of that, he has also shown strong leadership qualities during the army as a commander and also as the group leader for the engineering design project which was done in collaboration with Singapore Technologies Kinetics (STK). Reza is also known to be very determined and able to work in fast-paced and pressurized working environment while keeping a positive outlook in life. His experiences in teaching and tutoring also provide him with excellent interpersonal and communication skills.

Apart from academics, Reza has a passionate interest in sports. He is an avid supporter of Manchester United FC and often plays soccer on weekends. He was also an active member of the NJC Hockey team. Out of school, Reza values company with his family and friends as they form an extremely vital part of his life. He also enjoys reading, music and movies.